My Top 5 Ways to Thrive in a Seemingly Cruel World

My Top 5 Ways to Thrive in a Seemingly Cruel World

Empaths or highly sensitive people like me really struggle the more we watch the news (which for me is very rare) or spend too much time on social media. There is a lot going on around us, and sometimes we need to work harder to remember that people are basically good. Sometimes very hard. Today’s post is revealing my top 5 ways to thrive in a seemingly cruel world.

 

We all know that there is a growing issue surrounding mental health or mental wellness, and getting the help that is needed whether due to insufficient insurance, the stigma surrounding mental health in our society or something else entirely; it is not easy, and for many, it is definitely not working. We live a community where many are afraid to ask for help, and often those that ask do not get the kind of help that is needed.

 

I hope we can begin to take a step forward to healing in this world, but without guarantees, there are some things that we as individuals, families, and communities can do to not only coexist but begin to thrive.

 

This post is meant to bring hope, and comfort in a world that can be cruel.

1. We absolutely NEED to unplug. The media does a fantastic job at instilling fear. Take a rest from the media outlets. Spend time in nature, exercise, spend time doing the things that you love, surrounded by the people you love. I recommend at bare minimum 1-2 days a week away from all electronics. This is not to hide but to recharge and restore yourself.

“If you are empathic and feel others pain, it might be a good idea to avoid watching any TV shows or movies that are violent in nature.”

2. Work harder to recognize the good in the world. Be that person. Lead by example. Do as I say and not as I do….is well….crap. When you see someone struggling offer to hold space for him or her. Ask what it is that they need, and listen for the answer. Give extra smiles to strangers. Volunteer time to help others in need. These types of behavior will not go unnoticed, and it will inspire others to do the same. Let the goodness spread like wildfire.

“Start asking around in your community. You may be surprised just how easy it is to help others in need.”

3. Live and let live. The toxicity that spreads on social media, just as much as in the real world (at times) is an energy zapper. Trolls are what they are dubbed in the social media world. I like to call them keyboard warriors. Have a strong opinion about something? You’re likely thinking…who doesn’t, am I right!? Everyone has the right to think for himself or herself. You do not have to agree. You are not them! Straight, gay, transgender, white, black, democrat, republican, homeschool, un-school, cry it out, breastfeed, formula feed, vaccinate, don’t vaccinate, allopathic, holistic, Christian, Atheist, I could go on and on and on. Do no harm, and live and let live.

I could meet someone at a public place who is the complete opposite of me….and I could get on with them just fine as long as they held the same space as I did, their life is theirs, and mine is mine. If I see someone on social media saying something I am adamantly against….I can scroll on without saying ANYTHING AT ALL. It is easy to do. Be that person for a much happier and calmer life!

“Replace criticism with compassion, and judgment with understanding.”

4. This goes along with #3. You have every right to walk away from those individuals who are toxic to your peace of mind. That is expected and encouraged. I have had my share of toxic people in my life, and am happy to say they are no longer in it. I surround myself with those that champion and support me, believe in me, and help me to learn and grow. In return, I do the same for them. Those are the people that light me up inside, those are the people that I will travel across the country for and answer the phone at 1 a.m to help them when in need (you know who you are). Your tribe is the good in this world. Hold them close. Nourish within and inside your inner circle.

“Respect yourself enough to walk away from those that do not respect you.”

5. Nourish yourself, and your mind. You get to decide what thoughts you think as well as the energy you nurture and allow to grow. Fill your days with things that bring you pleasure. This goes well beyond self-care. Many talk of self-care, and while the small things are important, and definitely not a luxury…I am talking about the habits you have, your belief system, your boundaries that you set up for yourself and uphold. Learning how to say no. Putting goodness into your body, as well as your mind. The things you do every day to nourish yourself will have a long-lasting impact. Like Buddha said, the goal is to be calm and still despite what is going on around you. This takes practice and discipline. You do not ‘need’ the world to be happy.

I hope that you have found a small measure of hope and inspiration in my article. Be the change, spread the love.

 

xo Leslie

 

Supporting others when under stress….holistically

 

Mental Wellness, Are We Really Lost?

Mental Wellness, Are We Really Lost?

Mental health is a continued focus for good reason…..life is hard and our resilience may not be! We all have times where we feel like we are holding on by a thread, myself included. Mental wellness, are we really lost?

 

I have been taking deep dives into my childhood, my upbringing, individuals that have crossed my path and the lessons they taught me, for a number of years now.

 

This quote represents a lot of what I believe…or rather what I have unpacked and discovered about myself, and about you.

 

“Finding yourself”, is not really how it works. You aren’t a ten-dollar bill in last winter’s coat pocket. You are also not lost. Your true self is right there, buried under cultural conditioning, other people’s opinions, and inaccurate conclusions you drew as a kid that became your beliefs about who you are. “Finding yourself”, is actually returning to yourself. An unlearning, an excavation, a remembering who you were before the world got its hands on you.”. –Emily McDowell

 

We are not lost. That is not an accurate representation of our lives.  Our true selves never went anywhere, we are not lost, something to be found. We do not simply ‘lose ourselves’. Our real selves are buried, but if we work to understand our thoughts, feeling, and behaviors, we can find greater understanding of ourselves.

 

If we can identify and discover what our own limiting beliefs are, based on beliefs put on us from our parents or other adults, cultured conditioning, being told we are not good enough, fearing speaking our truth, opinions of others who are just projecting upon you, and a long laundry list of other things that have shaped us, we can begin to take off those weights.

 

If you only take one thing out of this article today, let it be this…..others opinions about you are only a mirror about how they feel about themselves. THIS is the truth!

 

Sometimes this means learning new things, other times it means unlearning; both equally important. We are limited, but not lost. We have blind spots but are not blind.

 

As Louise Hay so eloquently said, “If you accept a limiting belief, then it will become a truth for you.” 

 

Somewhere between the innocent sparkly child, you were, believing anything was possible, and adulthood…..you started to lose your sheen due to a whole host of limited beliefs. Some were ingrained in your belief system due to those of your parents, others were adopted due to the treatment you receive from others…..but we can change!

 

What can you do about it?

 

The first thing to be aware of is the moment you begin to question those beliefs, you are on the right path.

 

Take action! Start by writing them down. Not sure how to determine what those are? Write down a few goals and dreams, and listen to the first thoughts that come up. Do you immediately feel a tension in the body? Do your goals and dreams incite fear? Disgust? Anxiety? Doubts? Why?

 

Sometimes this is when the ‘should’s’ or the ‘I am not good enough’ thoughts come into play. This inner mean girl needs to be exposed for what she is….pure ego. Your ego is not there to protect you, but to stifle you. The task is not necessarily to transcend your own humanity but to embrace it. Rewrite it. Don’t like how you feel? Work through it, not around it…and definitely do not ignore it.

 

Ask for help! I worked with a beautiful soul who helped me to challenge my top limiting belief of “It is not ok to make a mistake.” This was ingrained in me from my upbringing. Good was not good enough. Mistakes were weak. That was hard to unpack as an adult, and others definitely preyed upon it. Doing the work was freeing, healing, empowering. We all make mistakes. This is where we learn, and I want to learn every single day I am on this path.

 

It took time, but I have almost arrived. I am perfect in my imperfections. I love every little piece of me…..mind, body, spirit…questioning on the daily everything I was ever taught. There is no other way.

 

Keep learning, my friends. Xo Leslie

 

You are the one you’ve been waiting for..you are the healer

 

Louise Hay video worth watching